If you’re feeling tired of being single and you’re sick of people telling you, “It’ll happen when you least expect it.” Or giving you vague advice like, “You just have to love yourself first,” flip the script on them and celebrate your singlehood. Stop focusing on what you don’t have and instead see what it’s like to feel happy being alone while making the most of this time on your own.
It’s okay to feel lonely and desire companionship, but that doesn’t mean it’s a good idea to lower your standards for a relationship. Acknowledge your loneliness, but don’t let it define you.
With a mindset shift you can be happy being alone and still desire to share your life with an ideal partner.
Take inventory of all the good in your life right now. Be grateful that you can choose to do things without conferring with someone else. Plus, you can use this time to learn, grow, explore, and celebrate!
Tired Of Being Single? Here Are 11 Reasons to Celebrate Being Single:
You Have The Freedom To Explore
When you’re in a relationship, you have another person’s needs, wants, and desires to account for. Being single means you have more freedom to follow your whims and desires. You get to decide how you spend your time, energy, and resources.
How you spend your resources is the biggest indicator of what’s really important to you. Don’t let your life get dominated by screens, whether you’re binge-watching TV, gaming until late into the night, or doom-scrolling social media. Numbing yourself with a couple of drinks after work is just another strategy to avoid feeling lonely and single.
How can you explore new ideas, new places, and new experiences to keep your passion for learning and growing in life? You don’t have to travel the world or jump out of an airplane to stretch yourself and grow.
You can take a meditation class, try a new workout, or even explore parts of your town you’ve never been to before. Being single and happy is all about being inquisitive and adventurous. And a big plus, there’s nothing more attractive than a person who is curious and passionate about life. When you’re happy being alone, you’re more attractive when you decide to start looking again.
Cynicism will never get you what you want. It’ll only protect you from experiencing anything new. So if you’re truly tired of being single then being open to new experiences opens you to meeting new people! And every person you meet knows more people you haven’t met yet. Expanding your life expands the circle of people you know.
You Can Make Peace With Your Past
Whether it’s a difficult relationship with a parent, or a broken heart from a past lover, your old wounds keep you stuck and are in the way of creating connection with new people. This exacerbates you feeling tired of being single. Part of you wants to fill that hurt by finding someone new.
Mine your past experiences to discover about yourself and let the past go. Growing from past struggles moves you towards your highest and best self and you become more open, more loving, and more connected to your soul and to your spiritual journey in this life. Use all of your experiences as opportunities to grow and become a better version of you.
Every person has lived through circumstances that are difficult. Don’t let your experiences defeat you. It’s the meaning of those experiences that matter most to determining your future. And YOU get to decide the meaning you give to those past experiences.
Can you find the learning from those painful experiences and open your heart even wider than before? When your heart breaks, it breaks open to hold more love.
You Can Focus On The Positive
Your mindset is the key to feeling happy being alone. Instead of dwelling on feeling lonely and single, turn your attention to what makes you happy. Pay attention to your inner dialogue and don’t allow yourself to fall into the rabbit hole of negativity — nip that inner critic in the bud.
You have control over what you think, what you feel, and what you do. When you keep your thoughts positive, you feel better about yourself, and you take actions that are in alignment with your happiness.
Instead of wallowing because you’re tired of being single, focus on all the good in your life. Practice gratitude for what you have, celebrate your successes, and affirm your positive qualities. Managing your mindset will support you in being single and happy.
You Can Strengthen Your Connection To Those You Love
Whether it’s your friends or your family or both, being single gives you time to invest in all your relationships. Use this time to clean up past miscommunications or misunderstandings or create even deeper connections with the people in your life.
When you’re on your deathbed, you won’t be worried that you didn’t put in more time at the office. You’ll be reflecting on your relationships. Don’t wait until then to reach out and reconnect.
Human beings are social animals. We aren’t meant to be alone. We’re members of families and we live in communities. Open up about your feelings and connect with those in your life who are important to you. If you’re tired of being single, reconnecting with an old friend may open the door to an introduction to someone new for you to date too.
You Can Discover What’s Blocking You
There could be a good reason why you’re still single and it’s not about how hard it is to meet people. Being single gives you time to introspect as well as discover you’re limiting beliefs and behaviors that cause you to feel tired of being single. Reflect on your past relationships and look for any patterns that may reveal themselves.
Even if every relationship you’ve been in has been different remember, you’re the common denominator in all your relationships. You are the one constant in each of these interactions. Look for patterns in your responses to your partner’s behaviors and how you handled heartbreak or rejection.
Taking the time to focus on yourself and discover the beliefs and strategies that no longer work for you can help you avoid those same mistakes in the future. If you’ve been single for a while, then love isn’t just going to magically happen for you. Discover what no longer serves you and make the effort to change.
You Can Fill Your Own Cup First
Part of being single and happy is discovering what refuels you and reconnects you to your inner child. You feel lonely because you’re out of rapport with yourself. You may think that someone else will fill that empty space inside, but no one can do that for you.
Don’t expect someone else to complete you. The Jerry Maguire myth is not a healthy dynamic, in reality, it’s a co-dependent relationship.
If you have a pattern of sacrificing your wants and needs in an effort to win someone’s love, you’re setting yourself up to breed anger and resentment. Filling your own cup means you make yourself a priority so you can feel happy being alone.
Discover the difference between your needs and your wants. Needs are not negotiable, but your wants are. It’s only a healthy relationship when two complete people come together to create a third entity: the relationship.
Now, when you meet someone new, you’ll be able to show up fully and never go into sacrifice again. If you’re sick and tired of being single, fill your cup and enjoy your newfound connection to your inner child.
You Can Work On Your Relationship Skills
Lasting love doesn’t just happen because you’ve finally met the “right” person. There isn’t some magical person that you’ll never have a disagreement or misunderstanding with. Lasting love isn’t about luck, it’s about becoming someone capable of creating lasting love.
You probably weren’t taught effective communication in your family of origin. Most people model the bad strategies of their parents or try to do the opposite of what they experienced in their childhood. Sex is instinctual, but good communication and relationship skills have to be practiced and learned.
Discover how to communicate your feelings, especially when you’re upset or triggered. Know the steps you can take to repair a relationship when there’s conflict. Learn the difference between what’s your responsibility and what isn’t and own your stuff. These skills will ensure that you can make love last when you’re ready to try again.
You Can Make New Friends
It tends to be more difficult to meet new people the older you get. Your habits and routines are well-worn grooves, and you go to the same places and interact with the same people. If you’re tired of being single and are ready to feel happy being alone, put effort into expanding your circle and make new friends.
Middle-aged men are currently suffering from a crisis of loneliness in our society. Interacting with people virtually won’t create an emotional connection. Nothing is real until you meet face-to-face. It’s true for dates, as well as for making friends.
Get out into the world, talk to new people, and make new friends. You can sit in a coffee shop with a book or a magazine (not a device) and smile at everyone who comes through the door. Start a conversation by remarking on someone’s attire, or by being curious about them and asking about their day.
That stranger you befriend could be the person who introduces you to your soulmate.
You Can Stop Filling Your Time With The Wrong Person
Don’t spend time with someone just because you’re tired of being single. Don’t waste your precious time in dead-end relationships. Wishing and hoping that someone will change for you is like wishing and hoping that the sun will come out on a rainy day. Ultimately, you’ll just end up exhausted and frustrated that you squandered your time and energy.
Every day you spend settling with someone else you block yourself from meeting someone new. Energetically that person is taking up the space that would be filled by someone better suited for you, someone who can fulfill your needs and the majority of your wants.
Take a risk and leave that dead-end relationship. You’ll finally feel happy being alone and free up your heart to allow someone new to come along. You’ll also free up your time to explore new strategies that we’ve already shared.
You Can Practice Keeping And Setting Boundaries
The most common issue in intimate relationships is the ability to set and keep boundaries. Whether you’re confusing your partner’s upset with your own, or your partner doesn’t respect your feelings or beliefs, or your in-laws are imposing themselves into your relationship, boundaries are most confusing in intimate relationships.
Boundaries are about respect, trust, and self-care. Having healthy boundaries means you can create a safe space for the two of you to work through your differences and grow stronger together.
When you’re single you have fewer obligations and less concern about how to balance your own time. Being single is a great opportunity to practice keeping and setting boundaries with everyone in your life: friends, family, and co-workers. If you’re tired of being single the best thing you can do is practice healthy boundaries with everyone in your life.
The more comfortable you become with setting boundaries the more your relationships will flourish. Practicing this important life skill will ensure your ability to set and keep boundaries with your beloved. Respectful love has a boundary and honoring that boundary will set you up for success in your soulmate relationship.
You Can Create The Vision Of Your Soulmate Relationship
Taking time to learn, grow, release the past, and focus on becoming the best version of you, allows you to feel happy being alone and truly appreciate that right person when he/she comes along. You’ll have a different appreciation for a relationship that you consciously create.
Love by accident means that you commit to the next person who makes you feel good, whether they’re the right person for you long-term, or not. If you’re happy being alone and fulfilled in your life, you can use your discernment to choose wisely, instead of rushing into a commitment because you’re feeling lonely and single.
Get clear on what you want and why you’re choosing to make a commitment to your next partner. Don’t let the rush of chemistry and attraction blind you to whether someone is a good match for you. You and your beloved will both change and grow over time. The only way to stay on the same page is to choose a partner who shares your values and is capable of working through your differences together.
The magic will be there at the beginning no matter what, it’s the selection process that allows you to share decades together and still be madly in love.
Whether you’re currently tired of being single or celebrating this time in your life, we would be honored to be your guides to soul-satisfying, long-lasting love. You can book a call with us by applying for a Soulmate Strategy Session here.