7 Ways To Heal A Broken Heart And Move On Energetically So You Stop Attracting The Same Kind Of Men

Break-ups can be devastating, especially when it happens with that guy that you really thought was The One. You find yourself searching Google for ways to heal a broken heart and move on. Reading every article you can get your hands on hoping that this horrible feeling will just go away.

Well stop your search. We’re here to help you not only move on from your broken heart but also to make sure you finally stop repeating your pattern of heartbreak with that guy that feels so right yet always seems to go so wrong.

What is it about certain guys that seem to have your number, and yet they always turn out to be the biggest disappointments?

The truth is we all have a pattern in our intimate relationships, and changing that pattern is the key to creating the lasting love you desire.

But first you’ve got to get over the current distress you find yourself in and get your confidence back.

With that in mind, here are:

7 Ways To Heal A Broken Heart And Move On Energetically So You Stop Attracting The Same Kind Of Men

  1. Cut Off Contact From The Guy Who Keeps Texting To See If You Are On The Line

Your broken heart is an open wound right now and you need time to let it heal. Checking his Facebook and Instagram or responding to his texts to “just be friends” will keep that wound open.

In order to start the healing process, you’ll want to cut off all contact. Block him on social media. You don’t need to be checking on his whereabouts or seeing if he is hurting as much as you.

Change his name in your phone to “Do Not Answer.” And follow your own instructions when he calls or texts. This way you won’t accidentally get sucked back in. Simply deleting him from your phone can cause a problem later when you accidentally answer that familiar looking number.

When you’re looking for ways to heal a broken heart and move on, cutting off contact with him is the first step.

  1. Don’t Resist What You’re Feeling And Allow Your Feelings To Flow

Nobody likes to feel heartbroken. It is one of the worst feelings in the world. However, putting on a brave face and trying to ignore the hurt, anger, and sadness will just prolong the pain.

Your biggest fear may be that you will never feel happy or loved again.

There is nothing further from the truth! Emotions are not static. Have you ever felt really good and thought that your feeling state would never change, that you’d never feel frustrated or anxious or sad again?

Emotions can be best compared to ocean waves. They flow through you and then recede to be replaced by another emotion. When you cut off your feelings they get stuck. What you resist persists.

Allow yourself time to feel all of those feelings. Play sad heartbreak songs and have a good cry. Set aside time to just scream into a pillow or under water in a bath. Let your feelings flow and you will find that you will feel better quicker.

You can even allow yourself to feel sorry for yourself, but we want to suggest a small adjustment on that idea. Feel the sorrow for yourself. Feel the sorrow of a broken dream. Feel the sorrow of your unfulfilled hope. There is no need feel pity because your desire for love is part of your human existence.

One of the most powerful ways to heal a broken heart and move on is to first allow yourself to grieve what you have lost.

  1. Kill The Hope That This Guy Will Magically Become The One

Hope is the first thing to enter a relationship and the last thing to leave. It is hard to let go of the hope when a relationship ends.

Part of you is still wishing and hoping that things will magically change and you’ll be able to go back to the way things were. Accepting that this is never going to happen is an important but difficult step.

He is not going to magically change and become The One. He is who he is. Needing him to change in order for the relationship to work will only lead you to more heartbreak.

Stop waiting for him to change his mind and decide he made a big mistake. Kill the hope that he will see what a fool he is for ending things. Kill the hope that he will become someone other than who he is right now.

We know this sounds a little harsh. But you’ll be ok. In fact, when you kill the hope of it being him, you open up the possibility of someone else, someone even better, to come into your life.

Out of all the ways to heal a broken heart and move on this one can be the most difficult. That little girl inside of you so wants to prove to him that you are worthy of his love. Killing the hope is one of the most loving acts you can take for yourself.

Take this step and watch your self-love grow.

  1. Forgive Him, Forgive Yourself, And Get The Learning From The Experience

On the list of ways to heal a broken heart and move on, forgiveness is the most valuable. Learning how to forgive will benefit you in all areas of your life.

The reason forgiveness is not at the top of this list is because you won’t be ready to forgive until you have given yourself time to grieve. There is no need to rush to forgiveness. Allow yourself to feel all of those bad feelings first because they pave the way for you to reach a place where you can forgive and move on.

And for those of you on a spiritual path it’s important to feel the full range of your human emotion. It’s okay to feel angry just don’t take destructive actions, simply allow your emotions to be whatever they are.

There is nothing wrong with any of your feelings. They are not bad. They are human.

Forgiveness releases you energetically from the relationship, and the energetic connection of being emotionally entangled with this person.

Forgiveness requires a conscious choice to release your hurt, anger and resentment, whether or not he deserves it. It doesn’t condone or excuse his behavior nor should you just forget what happened.

You may also need to forgive yourself for your behavior in the relationship. Maybe your communication wasn’t always kind. Or perhaps you made some mistakes and you regret things you may have said or done.

Owning your mistakes and taking responsibility for your half of the equation is good. Taking too much responsibility and blaming yourself for the failure of the relationship will just make things worse. The dance of relationship is like any other partner dance – it takes two to create it. You are only responsible for your own actions not the behavior or response of the other person.

Forgive yourself for not being perfect – no human being is. There is no such thing as perfection and trying to live up to that unrealistic expectation is hurting you more than you can imagine.

Taking these steps allows you to release yourself energetically from him and from the relationship. This may require you to find the Golden Nugget of Learning™ from the situation.

What did this relationship show up to teach you? Did you need to learn how to set clearer boundaries? Maybe you needed to learn to love and value you!

Whatever the reason, when you find the Golden Nugget you’ll allow yourself to feel grateful for the situation. This gratitude will let you finally release yourself from him so that you can be free to love again.

  1. Identify What Is Attracting You To This Unhealthy Pattern

You learned how to love in your family of origin – just like you learned to walk, talk, and tie your shoe. Once you know these things you do them on autopilot. You don’t make a decision about who you find attractive in a room full of people – it just happens.

Think about this way, when you walk into a room of a few hundred people you’ve never met before some of those people standout. It’s like they are highlighted. The rest of the people are like extras in your own personal movie. You know they are there, but they are kind of gray and in the background, and a bit fuzzy – they don’t pop.

Discovering what you learned about love in your family of origin and how that is not in alignment with what you truly desire in an intimate partnership reveals the unhealthy pattern that you’ve been unconsciously a slave to.

It’s that new face – same guy syndrome. At the beginning you think it’s going so well and that this is really it this time… only to discover that it’s just like the last time and the time before that after all.

We call this program for love that you learned in your family Your Love Imprint®. It is what causes the familiar to be highlighted while the great guy that would be an ideal match for you is just grayed out and he doesn’t even show up for you. It’s like he doesn’t exist.

Ultimately when you discover your unhealthy pattern, the one that is inside Your Love Imprint you’ll be clear on what it is you need to do to transform it. It’s like a roadmap to your beloved. This is the shortest of all the ways to heal your heart and move on so you can create the lasting love you deserve.

  1. Get Clear On What You Really Want Before Rushing Into Another Relationship

Most people date backwards which means that you are likely doing this very common mistake. You wait to find a person that gives you all the feels and from there you try to make the relationship work.

You may have tried to make it with the nice guy that you had no chemistry with only to find that didn’t work either.

Here’s the real deal common sense about love that no one else will tell you: You don’t have to choose between having chemistry or not. You get to have lasting love with a guy who lights you up!

Never settle for a relationship without the spark because you cannot settle for a lifetime. At some point it won’t be worth it to you to stay the course. It’s too easy without that spark to walk away when you hit that inevitable second stage of relationship – The Power Struggle.

Instead, create a crystal clear vision of the relationship you want without inserting a face into the dream. Know how you want the relationship to function. Decide ahead of time the dynamic that you would like to have between the two of you. Before you ever meet, choose the feelings that he invokes inside of you and all the body sensation that you would like to have.

You are the master creator of your life, and of all the ways to heal a broken heart and move on this fact will instill a confidence in you that is essential. No one can do this for you. No man will show up and suddenly make your life better. It’s up to you to create a life that is in alignment with your highest and best self and then create the vision of the relationship you want.

Once you are clear on the vision of what you want you won’t be far from living it.

  1. Say No To Anything That Is Not What You Want

There’s one caveat that may show up, and when it does you must commit to stay on course to lasting love with an ideal partner. When you take the steps above as we’ve outlined them its likely that you’ll be tested.

The old pattern may show up. The really tempting familiar situation with that guy who is lighting up all the colors inside of you may try to suck you in one more time.

It is very important you say no to the old way of being and reject him. This guy is just a reminder that you know better now. That you’ve evolved past him and his type.

You’re no longer a slave to that autopilot response to fall for the guy who is a match to Your Love Imprint®. The familiar may appear very tempting, but it’s up to this newly educated version of you to turn it down.

Saying no to anything that is not what you want means that you know you deserve to have what you truly desire. Of all the ways to heal your heart and move on this one may be the toughest of all.

We want you to know that you can stumble and you can hit that repeat button again and again and you’ll still get another chance. As a matter of fact, if you don’t believe us and you go back to Mr. Unavailable yet again this article will still be here, we’ll still be here because at any point you can decide to evolve past what is familiar so you can create what is in your true heart’s desire.

You will always have another opportunity to grow towards your beloved. The guy who will stand by you no matter what, the one who you can count on as sure as you know the sun will rise tomorrow, the one you’re hot for and he is also hot for you.

If that’s what you want as quickly as humanly possible then schedule a complimentary call with us by clicking here. We are guides to love and we believe you can have that long-lasting love you have dreamed of. Let us show you how.

About the authors

Love Coaches Orna and Matthew Walters

Orna and Matthew Walters are soulmate coaches and prolific writers about love. Finding love, keeping love, healing from heartbreak, bringing in your beloved and more. They have been published on MSN, Yahoo!, YourTango, Redbook, and have been featured guest experts on BRAVO’s THE MILLIONAIRE MATCHMAKER with Patti Stanger, and as guests with Esther Perel speaking about love and intimacy.

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