This week’s question comes from Anonymous:   

“Dear Orna and Matthew, 

I have been in and out of relationships for the past two years. I want to fall in love again. I am tired of one night stands! Please help me, I need to know how to attract love. I miss loving!”

Dear Anonymous,

We hear you, and we want you to know that we’ve been where you are. Wanting love, desiring love, and feeling like it is no where to be found. So here are several suggestions for you to begin creating love on purpose immediately:

1. If you don’t like one night stands – STOP HAVING THEM! (We feel there is no more to share on this subject as this is pretty darn clear. Simply stop.)

2. If you engage in sex as a “friends with benefits” situation – STOP! If you truly desire LOVE, then settle for nothing less than that. Energetically giving yourself to someone physically actually blocks you from receiving what your heart desires. (We have no judgment for those who aren’t looking for love to have sex, safe sex, with all those they feel safe with.)

3. Look for the love that is around you and in your life. Start looking for couples who appear to be in love and enjoying one another’s company out in the world – with friends, with family, with strangers. Look for people in your life that love you and the actions and words that have you feeling their love for you. If you have a pet, this is a great place to really focus on the love from an animal – they just give and give without any conditions – receive that love and really take it into your heart.

4. Clean out your heart, your mind, and your living space of all past relationships that did not work out. Look for the “Golden Nugget” of learning (trust us, its there), find out what you need to learn to grow from the past, bless them, and move on. You could even write names down on different pieces of paper and burn them in a safe place while stating “I release you for the highest good of all.”

5. Decide that you will settle for nothing less than what is in your True Heart’s Desire. If you are unclear what that relationship looks like, the fastest, easiest, most effective way to discover it is to work with a coach privately.

Attempting to create change in your behavior all on your own is very difficult. Think about how you have learned to do anything – you had a teacher. Even driving a car, someone taught you how to do it. You didn’t just sit watching other people and suddenly you could do it by having watched them.

The false belief of accidental love permeates our society. Do you feel embarrassed to have to ask for help? We are curious because you neglected to share just your first name.

If it’s true that you are embarrassed to have to ask for help then we have one question for you – how much do you desire soul-satisfying, long-lasting love?

Enough to overcome your embarrassment and get the help you want and need?

If you want to take a giant leap toward overcoming any obstacle in your way to love then we recommend our online program, The Science of Creating Love™.

This 7-module online program guides you to discover your past patterns, transform them, and then create a new vision of what love means to you. This new vision is no longer tainted by your bad love strategies from the past. You get to be a beginner in love once again.

You can read more about The Science of Creating Love™ here.

Once you complete this journey you’ll never have to worry about whether or not you will fall back into that old habit of settling for one night stands. You’ll know exactly how to date for your soulmate.

Love and Abundance,
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