This week’s question comes from Natalia:

Hello Orna and Matthew,

Thank you so much for all the love you have put into The Soulmate Shortcut, your generosity is so apparent in this book.

I will share with you what I found about my Love Imprint:

After going through about 1/3 of your book and reflecting on my life as a little girl it’s clear to me that my father was emotionally unavailable to me and also to my mother.

I think that my Love Imprint is unavailable men that I fear will bring division in my life. Either I don’t exist for them, or they don’t exist for themselves, or he is incompatible with my life. I am afraid that my therapy practice will suffer if my heart is not completely happy with the absolutely perfect man. I am afraid I won´t have as much alone time, I am afraid that I will be endlessly criticized as I have been. 

As I reverse this, I am left with something that sounds nice, but that I cannot relate to, I can hardly imagine what that would look like for me:  I would be looking for someone that is emotionally available, is supportive and respectful of my dreams and my life, and brings greater connection into my life.

I am trying to relate, but I cannot picture him now. 

I will keep listening to the rest of the material.

Thank you for listening, for your open heart.  If there is anything you can help me with, I would be very grateful.”

Hi Natalia,

Thank you for sharing with us your experience in going through The Soulmate Shortcut™. You made our day with your email! Thank you for seeing our hearts and for seeing our desire to help you have the love that is your birthright.

You have clearly received some fabulous insights into why you’ve been struggling in love. We want to invite you to have a whole new perspective about how to CREATE love.

What you truly desire is not the opposite of what you do not want.

It makes logical sense to attempt to “reverse” Your Love Imprint®, however that is not how true transformation occurs. The map that you’re looking for is a journey, not an end result.

By gaining clarity of Your Love Imprint it ought to be easy to see your limiting beliefs around love, your mental/emotional patterns, and behavioral strategies for giving and receiving love. This understanding gives your big beautiful prefrontal cortex some information… however nothing has yet changed for you.

Understanding of why you are the way you are may bring you some comfort, however, it is not the actual change you are looking for yet…

We think if you continue through The Soulmate Shortcut™ program you’ll have the chance to have new experiences. These experiences will pave the way for you to practice new behaviors.

Some of these behaviors will come easily and others may bring you some discomfort. Just like when a caterpillar transforms into a butterfly the metamorphosis takes time and commitment.

It may feel awkward at first for you to speak how you feel, or to make a request. As you have these new experiences you’ll find that you have new choices, and that you find a new kind of man attractive.

We can assure you that the man who is your soulmate will be emotionally available – and he will also have some other really wonderful qualities that you are not even aware that you desire just yet.

Allow yourself to be in the discovery of what is in your true heart’s desire!

Identifying Your Love Imprint® is only the start of the journey, transforming it will take some integration of the concepts in our book into your experiences. Those experiences will string together so you can have a new awareness of what you want.

If you would like some more clarity in how to create the map to your soulmate, so that you can literally see this new relationship in your mind’s eye, we recommend our program Your Soulmate Blueprint™.

Your Soulmate Blueprint walks you through the process of discovering what your relationship drivers are and how they influence your choices and your behaviors in selecting a man for a match.

This program also includes some powerful transformational processes that help you release your old emotional story about love. This frees you up to create from a whole new place. So, if you want to create the map to your soulmate, Your Soulmate Blueprint™ is the next step in the process for you.

We are here to be your guides to love.

Love and Abundance,